How I got here pt. 2 (with a twist!)

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This is going to be some M, Night Shyamalan type stuff! So bear with me. So by the end of April everything seemed to be going great, the baby was all caught up growing and despite not cooperating for any of the ultrasounds all the testing was coming back looking super positive. Then in May one of my Uncle’s passed away, he was the true patriarch of our family after my grandpa’s passing over 40 years ago, it was a devastating blow to my dad’s family. I received the call on my way into work, from my brother. I will spare all the details of the innerworkings of my family but this was a HUGE and unpredictable blow to all of us.

Upon arriving to work I let me co-workers and boss know what was going on. My sister called and while I was on the phone with her I felt the unmistakable feeling of something running down my leg. Holding back my hysterics I walked out grabbed my purse and told my boss I was once again going to the ER, this time however I was 17 weeks pregnant and in my mind this could only mean a true disaster was happening.

Once again I spent a day in the emergency room and thankfully my baby was happy, with a strong heartbeat and wiggling like a champ. Yet there was still little and basically no explanation for why I was bleeding. 

The next few months stayed quiet, literally like crickets. Our “friends” had left us by the way-side because fun Molly was no where to be seen. To them I had turned in to a always hot and complaining pain in the ass. Honestly they weren’t wrong, my least favorite thing in the world was going somewhere so my husband could have a few drinks and I could drive him home, I was always tired and Summer in Seattle is a nightmare trying to find a place with AC. However the friend issue is something I will address in later posts.

We took the road trip back to Minnesota for a wedding and to see family. It was so nice to be surrounded by the people who know you best. Then I took the trip home with my mom, a car full of baby things and my trusty little dogs.

My Mom stayed 3 weeks, long enough for all of us, and went home in early August. The day she left I had an OB appointment.

The next few months stayed quiet, literally like crickets. Our “friends” had left us by the way-side because fun Molly was no where to be seen. To them I had turned in to a always hot and complaining pain in the ass. Honestly they weren’t wrong, my least favorite thing in the world was going somewhere so my husband could have a few drinks and I could drive him home, I was always tired and Summer in Seattle is a nightmare trying to find a place with AC. However the friend issue is something I will address in later posts.

We took the road trip back to Minnesota for a wedding and to see family. It was so nice to be surrounded by the people who know you best. Then I took the trip home with my mom, a car full of baby things and my trusty little dogs.

My Mom stayed 3 weeks, long enough for all of us, and went home in early August. The day she left I had an OB appointment. That appointment led to a trip to the hospital because I was dialated. They just wanted to check fluid levels and stuff. We left and everything was ok. I was however advised to skip our friends wedding in Colorado due to the potential risk of early labor. I was worried I would end up on bed rest until October if I pushed things too far.

August 29th, it all changed again. I went in for a normal OB appointment as usual and she asked how I had been feeling. I told her I had some tightness and light cramping but nothing major. So she decided it would be good to do another check. It took her about 3 seconds and she said “oh no.” I can firmly tell you that oh no is not a phrase you want to hear when someone has their hand in your vagina.

I was 3.5 inches dilated and progressing towards labor. My doctor looked at me and said “are you ok? You need to go to labor and delivery now.” My heart hit the floor, I was only 31 weeks along, how could this be happening! I called my husband, he was shocked but calm and ready to roll as soon as i got home. He had made arrangements for someone to check on the dogs had our bags and electronics ready to go.

The next week was awful and what I thought was going to be the worst week of my adult life. For 6 days i was confined to the anti-partum. I was dreading how long the length of my stay could potentially be. It is like the antithesis of labor and delivery, your only goal there is to stay pregnant and at only 32 weeks that was exactly my plan. Baby Ryden however had other ideas. On September 2nd they told me if everything stayed the same and I didn’t progress and oh that Tuesday September 5th would be my discharge day.

September 3rd 2018: The contractions were real, I was doing fine breathing through them and I could still talk and I tried to stay calm because I really really wanted to go home. They had moved me back to labor and delivery early that morning because of slight progression but also increased contractions. I spent the day in room 8, pretty much crying, there was no way I was leaving the hospital now. That night at about 9pm I think the nurses were sick of my emotional responses. They agreed to let me take a break from the monitors, eat my food, take a bath and then they would give me a small bump on my sleeping meds to get some rest. The bath was drawn, I had a belly full of hospital food, Mathew and I were watching Black Panther. I got up to get in the bath and , GOD DAMNIT something started running down my leg. I tried jokingly to play it off like I had simply peed myself like a silly pregnant lady. The nurse, the L&D resident and my husband were having none of it. Back in bed I went and they slapped those monitors back on.

Things picked up so quickly from there is is just a blur. They placed an epidural after an eternity of poking me and telling me to sit still. I was told to lay on my side for a bit while they started the epidural, which never happened because after another quick check my baby was ready to roll. I was being told to roll on my back and start pushing because my baby was ready and the heart rate was dropping. I never did get that sweet medicine I was so looking forward to. My birth plan was so far out of the window it was basically in Idaho. My delivery was 12 minutes long and then he was here. Our little dude, it was so exciting to see him and more so to hear him cry for the first time. I would like to say that from this point on it was smoothing sailing but it was far from it September 4th 2018 would just be the start of our journey. This is why I am writing the blog, this is just the start of my story.

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How I Got Here Pt. 1

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We’re going to have to do this in two parts because it is eight months worth of emotion and change. So bear with me, part two will arrive later this week.

In late February 2018 on a whim I decided to take a pregnancy test. The husband and I liked to say “we weren’t NOT trying” to have a baby. Well are lack of trying paid off and I was pregnant. I immediately got online and signed up for every app, website and made all the DR appointments I would need. According the infinite amount of due date calculators I was due on October 25th. My little pumpkin would hopefully arrive just in time for my favorite holiday!

I was about 6 weeks along and completely overwhelmed and wanted to tell the world. The husband was a bit more conservative and wait until we were out of the “danger zone” and hit the 12-14 week mark. This was exactly where I wanted to be at this point in my life. I was ready, everything was going to be great. Then it was, not so great.

We had just got home from a Seattle Sounders game, I was feeling a little tired so I went to get ready for bed and when I went to use the restroom my worst fears came to light. There was blood, not just a little bit of blood, the amount of blood that would make anyone think about going to the emergency room. I tried to keep my composure, I was five days away from seeing the dr. Then I saw him, and I lost it. My husband ran up the stairs and hugged me he didn’t know what else to do. I called the 24 hour nurse line they told me no one would be upset if I decided to go in. So we drove to the ER, it felt like an eternity. Finally the Dr came in and confirmed that our lil glob was still there, they could not see the hear beat but, that was not abnormal for the size and that my OB would be able to provide more info.

I took Tuesday off work because we did not get home until 3am, then went in to the office on Wednesday and Thursday. My boss was extremely ill and we had a huge event scheduled that evening. Everything was going great, then at 5:45pm 15 minutes before the event started I felt it. Sure enough I went to the bathroom and there was more blood, a lot more blood. This time without hesitation we went to the ER, I knew this was it, I knew that I was losing the baby. Another excruciating wait in between ultrasounds, blood draws and endless questions and the Dr came in. I held my breathe while he talked to me and the husband. The baby was still hanging on, they saw the heartbeat! I have never felt so much relief. They told us that the baby was slightly under developed (only 5 weeks when I was supposedly 8 weeks). Another long night in the ER gave way to spending an anxious sleepless night until my first OB appointment.

The next day we met with the OB, found out that she would only be seeing us until June because she was moving to Israel. However she wanted to see us through this rough patch. I was diagnosed with a Subchorionic Hemorrhage and the Dr told us to remain cautiously optimistic. Things would stay quiet for the next six weeks…

Well, I’m exhausted from recounting all the drama that happened so early on, BUT we’re just getting started. Coming up next I’ll conclude all of this mess and we’ll move on to lighter topics.

xo

M

A New Beginning

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Welcome to my new blog, Restless in Seattle. I previously ran a page that I dedicated to living the most nerdy life as possible. I had started to slack off on that majorly, then in March of 2018 I found out that my husband and I would be welcoming our first lil chiclet at the end of October. It was amazing to me how quickly my perspective on life shifted. Life wasn’t about me anymore, there was a new meaning to living the best, happiest and most fulfilling life I could. In my upcoming posts I will catch you up on how things have gone so far. The good the bad and the ugly that I have dealt with during pregnancy has been the catalyst for sharing my journey. As of right now I am approximately nine weeks until we are suppose to meet our little one. Please join me on this new adventure!!